And all it took was a few glasses of Merlot

By the second glass of wine Saturday night we were getting a little loopy.

Former Room mate and I had traveled to our nearest Macaroni Grill for some good girl time and to see Friend J. He had been working there since sometime in December or January and so far I hadn't been over for a visit during one of his shifts.

We so very rarely get to see each other anymore for girl time that as soon as we got in the car we got into the conversation. She wanted the details on what happened with Mr. M. so we spent the 30 minute drive disecting what went wrong and trying to figure out why it is she's a magnet for older guys and I seem to do nothing but attract married men.

Lucky for us we can enjoy a good laugh at our own expense.

It was well into the prime time at the Grill by the time we got there. Since we were facing a good hour or so long wait, specifically requesting J's section made the wait longer, we sidled up to the bar for a glass of wine to make the time go faster. She settled on some merlot. I went with the realtively safe white zin. After saying hi to J as he raced by and pretending to ignore the one night stand who was working behind the bar, we resumed our conversation. Topics ranged from sex, to men, to purse shopping an finally to why in the hell someone in this day in age would still have a mullet haircut (this is South Central Pennsyltucky, afterall).

Before I knew it our delightful bartender Christian was refilling our glasses and sweet lord was I feeling it. Off of two glasses of wine. God I'm such a cheap date anymore.

During our indepth conversation over the course of the night, Former Room mate touched on something that I keep going back to. She had been doing eharmony for the past few months or as she put it "Pretending she's still doing eharmony."

We started talking about how tiring this whole process is. How by now, we've just gotten to the point where we don't decide if a guy is worth a phone call, but whether or not he's worth the effort of a 5 minute email. I could see where she was coming from. Lately I just can't find it in me to make an effort anymore. Getting dressed up, doing my hair and putting on some make up is so much less appealing than plopping down with a good movie and a bottle of wine or hanging out with friends at someone's house.

I'm just so sick of the scene I don't even want to deal with it anymore.

Part of me thinks that I've gotten used to the idea that I'm not going to find Mr. Right. That I've just accepted the inevitable and given up the good fight. Besides, there's no way I can compete with the girls in their 20s I see at the bars, showing all they've got in their size 2 low cut jeans. Another part, which Former Room mate and I talked about too, was that we've just grown too independent for our own good. We're too used to just taking care of things on our own that when someone comes along who offers to do something for us, we don't know how to take it. We're too comfortable with our own schedules and routines.

Hard to believe all of this came out just over a few glasses of wine in a chain Italian restaurant on a random Saturday night.

We never did come up with a solution. Just the promise to have more girl time soon and see each other in the next week or so. Personally, I don't even think there is a solution. From where I stand, just getting through each day is enough. There are other more important things to worry about right now so this girl is definitely taking a time out.

For how long, I'm not sure.