My old, and not necessarily welcome, friend insomnia is back. Following several nights of bad, borderline nightmarish type dreams, insomnia has taken up residency with the elephant sized dust bunnies in my room.

And the bitch isn't looking to leave anytime soon.

Sigh.

I'm not sure how it found it's way back to my humble abode but it did. With a vengance. I thought after I kicked it to the curb back in August it was gone for good. Syanora. Off to the West Coast with you.

Nope.

Last night's dream was the worst. I tossed and turned and maybe slept a grand total of 2 or 3 hours. After I opened my baby blues for about the bazillionth time at 4:30 a.m. I stopped counting the number of times I woke up with tears streaming down my face.

Part of the problem lies in Sunday's post. O.k., a big part of it lies there. For some reason I just can't shake the feeling that this whole thing between Him and I is on the verge of ending. He hasn't given me any reason to think that, it's just, I don't know, a gut feeling. Too often I've found those to be right. Sure, I went into this whole thing with eyes wide open. Heck, I know our *ahem* hanging out was mainly just about the hanging out but really, we're pushing that mark. The two-to-three month mark. The cosmic alarm clock most guys I'm with (whether it's just haning out or not) seem to hear, wake up and say Oh god, what the hell am I doing with this girl?!

I also happened to stumble upon something last night while I was cruising the 'net that reminded me of someone I can't forget. Someone who, unfortunately (or is it fortunately?) set up residencey in both my head and my heart and refuses to leave. Whether he realizes it or not.

God I have such messed up thoughts that run through my head. Sad thing is, once they're there, they very rarely leave.