Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Poor, neglected little blog

I'm starting to feel like a bad Liftime Movie Network mother. One minute I'm doting on and nurturing my precious little blog the next, I'm neglecting it and leaving it out in the cold to die.

My posting lately has been, at best, sporadic.

Excuses range from being busy (which I am) to I, for once in my life, have nothing to say. Shocking concept, I know. Really what it boils down to is...I'm scared. Yep. I said the s-word. Scared that I'm going to say something that will be saved for all posterity about a certain someone who will then use google to find me, read what I have written, and like so many others, run as quickly as possible in the opposite direction.

Sigh.

Because you see, he doesn't know I've got this little corner of the blogiverse. We met through other means and while he does have my email address and knows other details about me, this is the one thing I haven't told him about. It's like the final frontier. Once this line is crossed there's no going back.

Oh, I'm not holding out on you, dear readers (all three of you). We're still in the getting to know you phase. Still exchanging highly witty emails during our day and speaking by phone at night. An actual d...da...da...d...god I don't even want to say it for fear of jinxing it, but you know what I'm talking about, has yet to occur.

And I'm not even sure if it will.

You see, in the back of my mind there's this voice. It's a voice I've had whispering in the back of my head for a long time.

"Who do you think you are?"

"Why would a guy this great go out with YOU?"

"You might as well give up now because you know nothing is going to become of it."

I wish she'd shut the hell up and let me enjoy this. But she won't. And each day we go without actually having the d-word, the more inclined I am to think she's right.

Not exactly happy thoughts on a Tuesday but sometimes a girl has just got to get something off her chest.

1 comment:

Bev - Living In Hormoney said...

There's not a reason in the world he shouldn't be honored to go out with you!!