On second thought, this summer may just kill me

TBD called while I was at my mother's house yesterday. I had stopped in to pick up a few things my grandmother was getting rid of in the process of cleaning out her house and stayed to play with my niece. Because really, Auntie AG doesn't give up niece time too often.

"Dinner?"

"Welll...I haven't gone to the gym yet and I'm still at my mom's."

"Come on. Let's go to the White Rose."

"Maybe later. I have - "

"How much later? Let's just go grab something to eat."

"I don't know. I'll call you when I leave here."

I really hadn't intended on going out last night. The original plan was to stop by my mother's house then head over to one of the County Parks for a run. The rest of my night was going to be spent looking for some paperwork that has been lost in the deep dark depths of my room for the last three years my new part-time was asking for and finally fold and put away the clothes I washed a week ago.

As I sat there with my niece though, I thought, why not? Why don't you just go out and have fun?

So I did. In my head I had only planned on staying for a drink or two and then get home by 9. Two beers, a shot of Jameson's and something called a Pink Lemonade (Absolute Citron and Chambord were two of the ingredients I remember) later I was very wobbly on my feet. Luckily it didn't hit me until I got home but still, I was very much more drunk than I should have been or have been in a long time on a Wednesday.

My problem, you see, is I still don't know how to stick to my guns and use the N word. NO. Such a short easy word and one I still just can't bring myself to say to my friends. Sigh. Don't get me wrong, I love hanging out with TBD and JP. They're two incredibly fun guys. It's just that this morning, the dehydrated, more than mildly hungover version of myself was wishing the have fun why not another shot version would have stuck to her guns last night and said no when the last drink was put in front of her. This morning was NOT pretty.