Loss

In between all of the egg nog drinking, present opening and wishing for a white Christmas, there was some sadness that invaded over the last few days. Well yesterday actually, but that's neither here nor there.

We lost the 60lb furry room mate, Oscar the Dog. He had been doing pretty badly for the last month, getting to the point where we had to coax him to go outside and in some cases, physically take him out to the backyard. About two months ago he started
having problems with his back legs and hips, barley using them, acting like they were stiff and hurting him. Eventually he stopped using the steps, which for a dog that had to be underfoot every minute you were home was definitely notable. The last week and half he really started declining to the point where he wasn't even eating his food. I didn't want to think about the possibility of us losing him, he was only 9, but the reality was that he wasn't well. The vet confirmed it when Room mate #1 took him to the vet yesterday...and was told he had advanced stages of doggie cancer. So Room mate #1 made the tough decision and now we are dogless at my house. I'm not going to lie, I cried when Room mate #1 told me. Not just because I'm PMSy either (although that didn't help matters). Oscar was my buddy. My pal. He kept me company when the guys weren't there. When some dumb boy stood me up or broke my heart, again, Oscar was there to cuddle up with me on the couch. He kept my feet warm when I was cold and was a wonderful walking partner when we first moved into the house. I'll miss him very much.

Someone else I have come to care very much for has lost someone close to them too. Yesterday, in fact. I just found out about it today but it makes me sad too because I hate to see someone I care about in pain. And he's in pain, even though there was time to prepare for this loss, it still hurts.

But we're about to start a new year and even though there are a few more cracks on the old heart, it's a new chance to wipe the slate clean and move forward. No matter where that may be.