Conversations

This weekend is the big meeting of the rest of Will's family. I'd be lying if I didn't say I was a tiny bit nervous. Unlike our trip back in May to his grandparent's farm, it will be more than just his parents and grandparents around the place. From the way it sounds, the whole fam will be there, aunts, uncles, cousins. The whole gang.

I'm sure we'll get along just fine, I mean, I adore his grandparents and hopefully will get more time to get to know the parents this time around. Still, as is often the case when I meet new people I tend to hold back a little. Considering my penchant for being a loud mouth around those I'm comfortable with, that may be a good thing.

For me though this whole weekend is about spending more time with Will. We had a pretty serious conversation Wednesday night that helped calm my heart a little more. The last month or so has been, well, for lack of a better word, rough for me. I'm missing him more and more, which as stated before scare the jeebers out of me. I'm way more attached to him than I have been to anyone in a long time...and that is usually the point where I get hurt the most. I told him as much as we were having our late night conversation, snuggled up under the covers. Along with the fact that if he has any regrets or wants to call it quits now, it's the best time (minimal amount of hurt for me, you see). I really DON'T want him to go. But if it's going to end, now, above any is the best for it. Before I let down that last wall. God only knows the last time I was dumped after 7 months it took me over a year to fully get back to being myself.

Sigh.

But I'm not going to think about that now. It's take each day as it comes and as my oh so wise beyond his 25 years boyfriend said, we don't know what's going to happen tomorrow, a week, a month, heck 6 months from now, so let's just enjoy what we have now...and there's no way you're getting rid of me that easily either.